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The best way to be
The best way to be is untouched: Caring about the
well-being of others, but not making one’s well-being depend on theirs.
However, this state of existing, although sought-after by many because of its
guarantee for a peaceful, undisturbed life, is not very easy to achieve. In
fact it seems an almost impossible state to reach for a caring parent, for as
long as one has children, and one cares for them, one is practically
incapable of being content if the children are not doing well in the ways
that matter most:
health, happiness, and survival.
Yet, whether
enlightenment can only be achieved by being untouched or not, a state of
near-enlightenment is not impossible, even when one is “touched”
by offspring. The secret to reaching the near-enlightened state may simply
be to keep one’s priorities in order. That is, not attaching oneself
to
anything that can be taken away again: not a position, not a possession,
not even one’s own life. And yes, that too is a hard state to achieve, but
not impossible, especially when one learns to see things in
perspective.
It is all about perspectives, you know. Perspectives are
eminent.
Perspectives may be considered the biggest business of all. Look
around you: there are so many people and institutions that are making
staggering fortunes by being in the business of selling perspectives. Some
preach the perspective of guilt to place a burden on followers’ souls in
order to make them submissive. Some lecture the perspective of punishment to
impose fear
on followers in order to have them refrain from doing certain
things. Some promote the perspective of a forthcoming yet distant paradise as
a reward to motivate followers in doing the things they want them to
do.
And some preach the perspective of developing one’s own perspective:
Turning inside to obtain insight. They do that by informing others that they
are not followers, but entities who should develop their own perceptions; and
that they should not feel forced to do anything that is not in harmony with
their
spirit; that they should only be submissive toward their inner voice,
which will tell them what is the right thing to do; that they should only
fear this inner-voice, sometimes called conscience, as it will be their
sole punisher if they wander from their own values; and that they can
achieve paradise everyday of every year if they maintain respect for the
insights they have attained. And these are the ones that ultimately reach the
state where they can connect with others, as they have discovered their own
source of serenity, and can now care for others without making their
ultimate well-being depend on these others. They can practice interconnection
because they have achieved inner-connection.
So, yes: one can become
untouched by detaching oneself from everything that can be taken away;
positions, possessions, and even one’s own life. And yes, even parents with
strong emotional ties to their children can reach this state, but it may take
longer, and it may require more effort.
And who says anyway that nirvana
has to be a constant place to reside? Is life not in and of itself a chain of
changes, and thus, a guarantee for ups and downs? And is paradise, or nirvana
if you will, then, not an impermanent haven?
Now, for the ones who
wonder what the above elucidation about being untouched and developing one’s
own perceptions has to do with business: try to achieve anything while being
insecure, unfocused, disconnected from colleagues, and inwardly unbalanced.
Success, dear one, starts with knowing
what you want, and can only be reached
when you go for what you want. And going for what you want often requires
bundled efforts: team spirit. And team spirit requires a spiritual workplace.
And a spiritual workplace requires trust – and inter-connectedness. Now, if
success is what you want: your paradise; your nirvana; and you know that it
starts with knowing what you want, you may realize by now that knowing what
you want requires nothing more than inner-connection, which is…right: turning
inside to obtain insight.
Need I say more?
Joan Marques,
Burbank, April 30,
2004
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About the
Author:
Joan Marques emigrated from Suriname, South America, to California,
U.S., in 1998. She holds a doctorate in Organizational Leadership, a Master’s
in
Business Administration, and is currently a university instructor
in Business and Management in Burbank, California. You may visit her web
sites at http://www.joanmarques.com
and
http://www.spiritcounts.com
Joan's
manual "Feel Good About Yourself," a six part series to get you over the
bumps in life and onto success, can be purchased and downloaded at:
http://www.non-books.com/FeelGoodSeries.html
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