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Points to Ponder
(A compilation of the most essential statements from some
previously published articles from this author)
Patience is a virtue,
especially when facing the everyday tackles of life. Therefore, once you made
your choice to establish yourself in one location, go for it, even when
things get a little tough. Don’t forget the cumbersomeness of your previous
environment, so that you start over-romanticizing it, and encounter the
irresistible inner-desire to go back. Giving in to that impulse as soon as
the slightest setback occurs will turn you into a yoyo, restlessly moving
back and forth, and never obtaining peace of mind.
Failure is not just
for losers. We all fail regularly. We just don’t admit it, and part of the
reason for that may be that the world has taught us not to see regular
failures as such. They are generally accepted as the way to go: catching
people making mistakes in order to show off on our skills; waiting for
opportunities to prove their merit before jumping into them;
following trends
instead of setting them; focusing on our victory at the expense of another’s
loss; running a one-man show when others should be involved: these are all
failures that we can correct. All we have to do is tuning into our spiritual
awareness, and we shall be alerted.
Mentorism is an asset, so find
yourself a mentor. And keep in mind, that he or she does not have to resemble
you. In other words: women can (or maybe even should) have male mentors, and
a minority member can have a non-minority mentor. Also, don’t think that you,
the mentee, are the only one benefiting from this relationship. The mentor
will experience great advantages too, as a mentee is usually a devoted person
who will make him-
or herself available to-, and speak highly of the mentor.
And what is better for one’s reputation and self-esteem than a walking
advertisement? Nurture your emotional intelligence. So far it seems that
every time the quality of our life progresses, our mentality regresses. At
the same time that we develop our great inventions, we also cultivate
master-skills in making each other’s life impossible. Worse: we refuse to
make the progress we obtain in one part of our planet available to other
parts, thereby
directly contradicting our religious teachings that we are all
brothers and sisters, and that we should share with one another. The bare
boned truth is, that we don’t trust one another, and, sadly enough, have
allowed our civilization to descend to a level where we don’t have any reason
to!
Scrutinize your behavior regularly. The leaders who will be most
successful in modifying co-workers’ behavior are the ones who don’t mind
modifying their own. These are the leaders that enhance the learning
mentality in their workplace. They try to lay their hands on every release of
knowledge, whether it’s a seminar, a book, or a movie, and as lifelong
learners, they
inspire others to do the same.
Success is nothing more
than doing what you like: executing your passion. So, do what you like most,
and do it in a setting you feel comfortable with.. If you can achieve that,
you are successful. And happy! And if others call it selfish, that’s
fine.
Happiness is strongly linked to flexibility. When, for instance,
two people are striving for a single, indivisible goal, the one who finally
reaches it will be successful and happy. The other will then have to be
flexible and redirect his or her focus onto something new. If one goal turns
out to be unachievable, most of us fortunately have the suppleness to
redefine our desire and go for the newly formulated goal.
There is no
all-encompassing success formula for raising children Therefore, if you want
to do a good job as a parent; the best way is to listen and to communicate.
And to tell your children that you want to be their friend, but that you are
their parent as well, and that they cannot expect the impossible from you,
which would be: shrugging when they make the same mistakes over and over
again. Yes, you will not turn your back upon your
child under any
circumstance, but the perspectives have to be set
straight. Period.
The crab bucket mentality is very much alive.
Everywhere: it is not just limited to larger environments, such as countries
and cities, but it exists in work environments as well. An example? No
matter how good your intentions are; if you leave your old environment, gain
knowledge and experience, return as a changed person, and try to share the
knowledge you gained with your old friends and relatives, they will have a
hard time
accepting it. People are generally more willing to accept
instructions from strangers than from old acquaintances. Just make sure you
are not one of the crabs…
Outsourcing is today’s reality. Deal with it
responsibly: invest in
yourself. Learn as much as you can, and stay abreast
of developments. Make yourself multi-applicable, and try to maintain more
than one source of income. If you have the choice between a raise or
training, choose for the latter. It will turn out to be a lucrative long-term
investment in the organization called: You
Most of the lemons that
life throws at us were initiated by our own choices.. So, learning to make
lemonade should be one of our basic skills. However, we should also develop
the sensitivity and astuteness to first detect whether a lemon is really a
lemon, or just looks like one: many opportunities disguise themselves as
troubles at first sight. The art is to see through them.
Adhering to one
single ideology is silly. Real success is only achievable when all mindsets
are in harmony with each other. Spirituality in the workplace, for instance,
is the very epitome of sprinkling a socialistic dust in a capitalistic
environment: moderating competition, while enhancing cooperation; valuing
individualism, while enhancing team performance; being
unique, while feeling
interconnected…
Hope is a powerful phenomenon that, no matter how often
ridiculed, can never be discarded as insignificant. There are many emotions
underlying, surrounding, and radiating from hope: attitude, action, success,
endurance, patience, resilience, postiveness, risk-taking, goal setting,
strategizing, and belief, to name a few. Hope is the driver behind our
actions, the fuel
in our pipes, the wind beneath our wings.
Freedom is
only possible when you get rid of over sensitivity toward the actions of
others. Remember: if you want to be free, you have to grant others the same.
Suing left and right is no sign of freedom, but a concerning token of
increasing mental, emotional, and spiritual captivity. It enhances fear
within society, and it confines spontaneity to robotic levels. If we want to
live and work pleasantly with each other, we will have to be willing to give
and take. Otherwise, we are only fooling ourselves with our cries for more
connection. For being connected means: opening yourself; being vulnerable;
and risking the chance of being hurt.
Joan Marques, Burbank, April
17, 2004
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About the
Author:
Joan Marques emigrated from Suriname, South America, to California,
U.S., in 1998. She holds a doctorate in Organizational Leadership, a Master’s
in
Business Administration, and is currently a university instructor
in Business and Management in Burbank, California. You may visit her web
sites at http://www.joanmarques.com
and
http://www.spiritcounts.com
Joan's
manual "Feel Good About Yourself," a six part series to get you over the
bumps in life and onto success, can be purchased and downloaded at:
http://www.non-books.com/FeelGoodSeries.html
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